Random Cancer Musings

I've been thinking about cancer alot lately, what a surprise, and have come up with a couple items I think need a good look. While the arrival of the cancer could be completely random, it seems that there are things we do/say/think that can keep junk building up inside of us on many levels and create bad stuff, like tumors for example. While I may never find out exactly why cancer has come to me, this gives me the perfect opportunity to try and get some of the angst/anger/rage/sadness out of me, perhaps, so I am going to try my new two-pronged approach to cancer treatment.

Basically my idea of the two-pronged approach is coming at this from both the masculine and feminine sides. The masculine is pretty well represented by modern cancer treatment: attack, kill, drive out - and we are doing a great job of that with the chemo, hormones and immunotherapy in a warelike manner. The feminine side needs attention too, though. This is the question: Why are you (cancer) here and what can you teach me? If I can learn your lesson, will you move along and let me live happily with my newfound knowledge? Will you never have to visit again, years down the road, because I missed the "message" the first time around? I think this deserves some attention. It probably sounds a bit woo woo but I don't think having bad stuff inside and not fully clearing it out, on physical, emotional and/or spiritual levels will ever allow a full healing, so I think I'm going to have to dig a bit here.

I am starting by trying to free some creativity, as fibroids (especially the big bad baby that started this whole thing) are supposed to be signs of blocked creativity and unborn ideas, and this blog is actually a help. I'm also working on visualizations for freeing the cancer from my lungs by inhaling deep cleansing breaths and releasing the cancer cells (or stormtroopers, as I think of them - the tumor is the death star, for all you Star Wars fans) harmlessly into the air, where they evaporate into light and then nothingness. I've received some excellent book recommendations (throught this blog, btw - thank you!) and have some additional material to use for addressing body and emotional issues and cancer in particular, but as usual always welcome recommendations.

I think many issues that as a younger person seemed like a "big deal" are falling away now, but I am still trying to acknowledge them and then release them, especially viewed from my new perspective, so maybe this will move along well, and if this post is a bit random in nature I apologize, but I hope my basic thought process gets conveyed on a level that makes sense. more on practical matters later!