Sunday, July 5, 2009

Guilt

I at times still have my moments of anger due to Heather not being here when it comes time to doing things or going places that I need to do it alone. But those feeleings are slowly changing to guilt when it comes to doing or going to fun things. I know that I shouldn't, and yet I still do. I wish and talk to Heather that she should be with me and enjoying this with me. Last night as an example, I went to some of our very close friends for the evening and hung out. I was periodically struck witht he feeling that this wasn't right without Heather. We had fun, we watched the race, and later I went home. When getting home I sat in the drive way and couldn't stop talking to Heather about wishing she was with me tonight to enjoy the evening. (Especially since Kyle wrecked himself lol).

I know she and I joked about not becoming a hermit, that I would need to get out. She once even threw out how she needed to get me datable but hadn't got me to pick up my socks and shoes yet (what a brat). I guess this is another thing that will pass with time, but now it leaves me a little empty and guilty.

2 comments:

  1. Hey Scott,
    I'm glad you got out last night.... I'm sure this long weekend has been hard; so much free time to feel, and think, and miss.... So glad you were able to get out and play a little. You know Heather would be glad, that you are having some good times. You do deserve to be happy...

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  2. We were glad to have you over and will keep asking everytime we do something. We try not to pressure you too much and just want you to know that you are always welcome with us. Sometimes it is hard to know if we should call and bug you more, but we try to keep a happy medium. Thanks for the friendship and tiaramisu. ps - lucky draw with 18.

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